You’ve heard of a shepherd, I presume? A man who tends to a flock of animals ensuring they’re safe but also do what is expected of them. Making sure they live long enough to live a fulfilling life and not fall foul of the many, many hazards that wait for them in this world. I suppose in this day and age I have to say it could be a woman as well, just to make sure I’m being woke enough.
Many have tried to take the mantle of shepherd here in Arcadia, but none-so-much as the man who now goes by the name of Captain Arcadia. First as the Yellow Panther, he wanted to save the innocent sheep of Arcadia by keeping them away from danger. Not exactly perfect at his job, though, he instead led the sheep into the gaping jaws of danger, as the Kingdom was nothing but a front for the wolves to blend in.
Then, Arcadia returns, in his new patriotic garb, and wants to save the people again. “Follow me”, he begs of them, “and I will lead you to your safe haven!”.
The problem is that they remember the last time. They remember how he failed them. They remember that in the end he was a sheep too, led along by a higher shepherd.
He is doomed to repeat his mistake with each new moniker, each fancy dress costume, and each superhero pose he concocts, because the shepherd is not the one who controls the sheep. It is the dog that controls them, gracefully sprinting in bursts and twirling to direct the sheep to where he knows they’ll be safe. Captain Arcadia, the pure and simple truth is that you do not have enough of the dog in you to lead your sheep to safety.
So join them, because I’ve sure as hell got the dog in me. I’ve done nothing but lead people my whole life. My flock are my circus, who never want for anything, and who I would never let harm come to. But I don’t stand with a crook and a cloak, I snarl. I bare my teeth, I run them into the ground, all the while knowing that although they may hate me now, this is only temporary, and in the end they will see me for what I truly am.
Their saviour.
And that’s why the child trusts me, Cap. He can see that although he’ll have to work hard to be in my troupe, that I will NEVER let any harm come to him, or any of my other fluffy sheep. I will pace that field around their pen with laser focus and iron sights, and they’ll forever be safe in my ward.
Captain, you should think about joining my flock. You’ve been a terrible shepherd, let’s see how you fair as the flock.
Welcome to the freak show, let us show you the way!