Felix Foley was the happiest puppet master in all of Arcadia. With a spring in his step and a smile permanently glued to his face (figuratively, of course—though some suspected literally), Felix had spent years delighting children with his whimsical puppet shows. He had a knack for making his puppets seem so alive, you’d almost think they were real. But Felix always said, “It’s all in the wrist!”
One particularly crisp day, Felix was setting up his stage in the town square. He had his classic characters—Wobbles the Clown, Mr. Giggles, and Sir Floppsington, the slightly confused knight—laid out, ready for the afternoon show. But as he stretched to hang up a backdrop, THUNK, he banged his head on a low-hanging beam.
“Yowza!” Felix yelped, rubbing the spot where the beam had introduced itself to his skull. He swayed on his feet for a moment, blinking away stars. When his vision cleared, something was… different.
“Did you hear that? He said yowza!” said a voice to his left.
Felix turned to see none other than Wobbles the Clown standing upright, arms crossed, smirking at him. The puppet’s felt mouth was moving. By itself.
Felix chuckled nervously, shaking his head. “Ha, that must’ve been quite a bump. I’m hearing things!”
“Nope! I definitely said yowza,” Wobbles replied. “Classic catchphrase, by the way.”
Felix’s jaw dropped. He quickly glanced around. Mr. Giggles the jester was now lounging against the puppet stage, looking deeply contemplative. Sir Floppsington, meanwhile, was in the middle of a one-sided sword fight with a broomstick, declaring victory over “The Kingdom of Sweep.”
Felix blinked. “You… you’re all alive?!”
Wobbles gave a snort. “Alive? Please. We’re muppets. There’s a difference.”
Felix stared. “I… I think I need to lie down.”
Felix gulped as the town’s children gathered around. His puppets—no, muppets—were still very much active. Wobbles was juggling his own arms, Mr. Giggles was balancing on one foot in a meditative pose, and Sir Floppsington had now declared war on a passing squirrel.
Felix swallowed hard, pulling a few strings to begin the show. “Uh, welcome everyone, to… uh… Felix Foley’s Funhouse?”
Without warning, Wobbles leapt up, taking center stage. “It’s showtime, folks!” he hollered, twirling through the air. The audience erupted in laughter, believing this to be the most incredible special effect they’d ever seen.
“Okay, let’s get something straight,” Wobbles whispered to Felix. “We’re stuck with you now. You hit your head, and BAM—now you see us for what we really are: magic muppets. Don’t worry, we’ll keep this entertaining.”
Mr. Giggles somersaulted onto the stage. “Let’s get existential, shall we? Are we real, or are we just figments of your imagination? Does it even matter? We’re adorable either way.”
Felix glanced around at the delighted audience, then back at his wild, woolen companions. Maybe this wasn’t so bad after all.
And so, Felix Foley, puppet master extraordinaire, became the first man to host a show with an all-muppet cast—real ones. Well, real enough.