The Candle
So... I haven't been in OSW since Volume I and this is my first shot at coming back. Any feedback would be greatly appreciated.
I really like the writing. Love the voice of Malaki Midnight - it's got that eerie, sinister tone to it that I think if anything you could even push further into with the way you phrase things.
In terms of content, I think the analogy you portray here is well controlled throughout - it fits the backstory of the opponent well and you've done a solid job unpacking it.
It list me a little bit when it spoke of the candles lit under the other people Malachi has come across, but only a touch - I think it may be the wording in that section, and the section before where you speak of Maxwell being heroic. Nothing at all major, just took a couple of read throughs of those sections to get what you were saying.
All in all, a bloody solid debut promo. Keep writing from this place and you'll do well. The more you dig into storylines as they come up, the more fuel you will add to the fire of your writing. Keep it up dude