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“THE TANGLED WEBS WE WEAVE”
EPISODE #257
JANUARY 24TH 2022

 

 

 

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“RUST OUT”
FEATURING
THE SANDMAN, VIPER ROBERTS, ISRAEL GRIMWOLF & VOYNICH

Click.

Static covers the screen as a Play ► symbol appears in the bottom right-hand corner.

Cold open.

The Sandman.

The OSW World Heavyweight Champion is stood in the middle of the ring to a chorus of boos from the OSW faithful. He has the World Championship draped across his shoulder and a microphone in one hand.

The Sandman ] “At Revolt, everyone who wants a piece of me will fight in a four on four match. Everyone in that match wants my OSW Championship, but see, not everyone deserves it.”

He begins pacing back and forth.

The Sandman ] “Now…”

Electric guitar.

Reach Out, Touch Faith.

BANG!

A huge explosion erupts at the top of the ramp from which Viper Roberts suddenly appears with his head bowed. He looks up slowly with a shit-eating grin before scanning the room through his silver locks.

The lights flicker from red, to yellow, to orange as he descends upon the the ring; almost as if he’s walking through a fiery inferno. Once in the ring, he stands dead centre, facing The Sandman.

He’s not afraid.

Viper Roberts ] “You know, I have to give it to you – last week’s little dream escapade was quite cute. You definitely let us know you were the boss, until Mordecai put an end to proceedings. Do you think he received the memo about you being large and in charge, tough guy?”

The Sandman tilts his head, clearly unamused.

Viper Roberts ] “At Revolt, we may be on the same side, but if the line for Championship rematches starts anywhere, it’s behind me – everyone else can wait their turn. Grimwolf and Gable may have played silly fuckers at Red Snow to ruin my Championship reign, but that doesn’t change the fact that I am the rightful OSW World Champion.”

“Black Sails,” hits the p.a. system, the fiddle and bass just getting started as deep blue lights swim across the slaughterhouse.

As the music swells and the chorus joins in, Captain Israel Grimwolf slowly steps out onto the entrance ramp, sure to keep his distance from the enemies in the ring. The Double Feature Championship fits snugly around his waist.

Israel Grimwolf ] “The line starts behind you, does it matey?”

The Captain shakes his head, chuckling.

Israel Grimwolf ] “I don’t think for a second that it does. I’m the former OSW World Champion – I’m the man next in line. You can stake your bullshit claim, me hearty, but that belt was wrapped around me waist not two weeks ago.”

The Sandman ] “So this is how it’s going to be?”

The World Champion shakes his head and begins pacing again.

The Sandman ] “I warned you both that if you come for me, I will destroy you. Yet here you are, both demanding to be at the front of the line for what’ll be your end of days. So, why wait? At Rust Out, I’ll defend my Championship against you both in a Triple Threat Match.”

The crowd ‘ooohhh’ with anticipation.

The Sandman ] “But rest assured that when the final bell sounds and your aspirations lay shattered like your bodies upon a canvas of blood, there will be no sweet dreamsonly an eternity of nightmares.”

The slow sound of a guitar trickles throughout the speakers as the lights dim to show but a spotlight on the stage. “Shadow on the Sun” by Audio Slave soon begins to kick in.

“Once upon a time
I was of the mind
To lay your burden down.”

Voynich wastes no time in heading out onto the stage with a microphone in hand, looking at Israel Grimwolf, who now stands beside him.

Voynich ] “I haven’t come out here to fight.”

He assures The Captain, with a hand raised.

Voynich ] “But if we’re staking claims for Championship belts, you have one that belongs to me.”

Voynich points to the Double Feature title on Grimwolf’s waist.

Voynich ] “So, I’m putting you on notice, Grimwolf. At Rust Out, the Championship special, you can have a triple threat for that title, if that’s what you want.”

He says, motioning to the World Championship on Sandman’s shoulder.

Voynich ] “But you will be defending the Double Feature Championship against me.”

Viper Roberts ] “It looks like we have ourself a little conundrum, doesn’t it?”

Viper Roberts steps to the ropes and leans on them.

Viper Roberts ] “At Rust Out, I propose we add Voynich to our Triple Threat and make it a Four Way. Two falls, one title per fall. The winner of the first fall will win the Double Feature Championship and the winner of the second will win the OSW World Heavyweight Championship. Can’t say fairer than that, can you champ?”

That’s Viper Roberts, ever the opportunist.

The Dream Demon thinks about it for a moment. His odds of retaining may decrease, but his opportunity of walking away with a title will increase. It’s a fine balance.

The Sandman ] “What’s one more body for the horror I plan to leave in this ring come Rust Out?”

Viper Roberts ] “And you?”

Viper says, pointing at Israel Grimwolf.

He has to think about it too. It’s either two matches and a chance at winning back his OSW World Championship or it’s one match for all the marbles.

Israel Grimwolf ] “Batten down the hatches, shipmates, cause Israel Grimwolf doesn’t back down from a fuckin’ fight!”

All four men look at each other, an epic match booked for Rust Out.

It’ll be a Four Way Match.

Two Falls.

Two Championships.

Shit is about to get fucking real.

Cut.

 

 

 

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OPENING MATCH
STANDARD MATCH
TENCHU vs. THE SANDMAN

Tenchu has a massive opportunity tonight. Can The Hidden Blade unravel The Dream Demon and defeat the reigning OSW World Champion.

The Metal Shadow is immediately on the offensive, backing The Sandman into a corner. Irish whip from the Odowara Assassin…RIPCORD! BACK ELBOW!!! INTO A X-FACTOR!!! Superb combination by Kodokushi and an early cover…ONE! KICKOUT! It will take a lot more than that to put down The Dream Demon.

Tenchu hauls Sandman to his feet….SAND TO THE FACE!!! But it has no effect on Tenchu. It does buy Sandman the moment he needs….BIG BOOT!!! He almost tears the cables of the robot’s spine. The World Champion grabs Tenchu by the throat and lifts him high into the air….TO SAND!!! NO!!! EYE POKE!!!

Tenchu lands on his feet and lifts Sandman onto his shoulders….LETHAL BLOW!!!! This could be it….ONE! TWO! THREE-NO!!! SHOULDER UP!!! Tenchu climbs to the top turnbuckle, he’s going high risk but he has to put it all on the line here. THE HIDDEN BLADE!!!! Sandman rises…and COUNTERS….DEEP SLEEP!!!! He covers for ONE! TWO! THREE….KICKOUT!!!

Kodokushi is showing tremendous heart for an inorganic being. Sandman drags him up but an uppercut from The Hidden Blade and now the double underhook…ODOWARA SENT….Sandman rolls out….TO SAND!!!! Chokeslam puts down Tenchu for ONE! TWO! THREE!!!

An impressive display from the metal warrior but The Sandman displays a champion’s mettle to pick up the win.

 

WINNER: THE SANDMAN

 

 

 

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“THE RAINBOW PARTY”
FEATURING
THE GENERATION KID, STARBOY & VIGOUR

Last week, after Fuck The World.

In the emergency room, The Generation Kid sits with his hand bandaged in a bloodied wrap. He looks gaunt and pale, having lost a fair bit of blood after Vayikra nailed him to a cross.

Just then, two figures slump down in chairs next to him.

It’s Starboy and Vigour. The former slaps a bottle of water into the bad hand of TKG, causing him to yelp in pain as he instinctively lets it drop to the floor.

Starboy] “Shit, sorry babe. Starboy didn’t think.”

The Generation Kid shakes his hand free of the pain.

The Generation Kid ] “It’s okay. Thanks for coming to my rescue. I thought I was a goner, man.”

Vigour ] “Nah, we’ve got each other’s backs. It took us a few minutes to hear about it, but once we did, we came straight out. I’ve also been told at that Revolt, we’re going to face off for the Rewind Contendership. All might not be lost, kid.”

The Generation Kid ] “Oh? So we have to fight? I mean, that’s cool n’ all, but I don’t wanna lose any friends over it. Hell, I’m not even sure I belong here. This entire place is bogus. Everywhere I turn, some heinous spaz is trying to kill me!”

Starboy laughs at the eighties slang.

Starboy] “Heh, well, how about we put a stop to that?”

Vigour ] “You’re not the only one who needs someone to watch their back. Last week, we talked about becoming friends – now, we’ve got another idea.”

Starboy] “A mother fucking stable!”

The Generation Kid looks confused, despite the fact that either side of him sits a grown man with a ginormous toothy smile.

Starboy] “The Rainbow Party!

Vigour ] “Where the party never stops.

The Generation Kid ] “Wait, that’s mental! You wanna create some kind of mega schweet group?”

Both Vigour and Starboy nod their heads enthusiastically.

The Generation Kid ] “That’s bodacious. I’m in, boys!”

He says in delight.

The Generation Kid ] “Knowing you guys have my back, I feel much safer already!”

He holds his hand up, mistakenly receiving a double high five straight to it.

The Generation Kid ] “Owwwww

Cut.

 

 

 

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“BEYOND THE SCOPE”
FEATURING
DEATHNOTE & THE SANDMAN

Darkness.

The boiler room.

Deathnote stands at an altar lit by candles that surround it. Sat atop the altar is his book of death, and he browses it, searching for something. With his eyes focused, he hardly notices the breeze that wisps through the air.

Woosh.

Suddenly, the candles expire and we’re thrust into darkness. Deathnote picks up the candle upon the altar and relights it.

The Sandman is stood directly behind him.

Deathnote ] “I’m surprised you’ve sought me out.”

He turns to face The Dream Demon, who in turn is surprised that Deathnote knew he was there.

Deathnote ] “You interfered in matters that need not your attention.”

Deathnote grimaces.

Deathnote ] “Such matters that are beyond the scope of your creation. Even your brother knows of your mistake.”

The Sandman ] “Yet I had the power to do so.”

He shrugs.

The Sandman ] “Doesn’t that speak volumes, librarian?”

The Author of Death chuckles.

Deathnote ] “Do you really think that you’ll only answer to me? At Red Snow, you caught the attention of something else. Something even you should be afraid of. Something not many know exist.”

That stops The Sandman in his tracks.

The Sandman ] “That’s a fallacy.”

Deathnote ] “Is it?”

There’s an eerie pause. The Sandman clearly knows of what Deathnote speaks and it’s jarred him.

It’s scared him.

Deathnote ] “There will be a time when I hold you accountable for your interference in the life and death of Luke Storm.”

He angrily says.

Deathnote ] “Revolt and our four on four will not be it.”

As if without a care in the world, Deathnote returns to his book.

Deathnote ] “But rest assured, Sandman – your time will come. First, I will seek vegeance upon thee and when I’m finished, it may choose to do the same.”

Wisp.

Static.

The Sandman is gone.

Cut.

 

 

 

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THE MID-CARD
STANDARD MATCH
VIPER ROBERTS vs. KAINE KNIGHTLORD

Will Viper Roberts slither his way back to the OSW championship or will Kaine Knightlord continue his winning ways in 2022?The Dark Detective rushes out of his corner at the bell and charges at The Head Snake with a spear! NO! He catches a snakeskin boot to the face for his troubles! The Viper peels him off of the canvas and DDT – ODE TO THE SNAKE! Roberts spikes The Shadow Bat’s head hard into the canvas!

Knightlord kicks out at two. Both on their feet Viper hits the ropes. Kaine ducks a clothesline and kicks Roberts in the midsection… BLOOD DRIVER – PUMPHANDLE NECKBREAKER OVER THE KNEE!

The Viper slowly gets back up onto his feet and walks right into Knightlord. SNAKE OIL! HE SPIT THE DEADLY VENOM INTO THE EYES OF THE DARK DETECTIVE! Viper lets out a sadistic laugh but stops in his tracks… KAINE GIVES HIM JUST A BITE! HE’S BITING VIPER’S FUCKING HEAD!

They stumble around the ring, Kaine trying to wipe his eyes clear of the blinding substance and Viper wiping blood off of his forehead and out of his eyes. They bump into each other – NIGHTRAID! THE KILLSWITCH! NO! VIPER SPINS OUT – SNAKEBITE! WRAPAROUND NECKBREAKER! ONE! TWO! THREE!

The Viper slithers his way to victory and puts away The Dark Detective!

 

WINNER: VIPER ROBERTS

 

 

 

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“HONOUR AND DISHONOUR”
FEATURING
TENCHU AND BANZAN

Somewhere Else

In Odawara, Japan, Tenchu is seen walking through a graveyard. Monuments to those long deceased stand tall, well taken care of by both family and grounds keeper. Odawara Castle looms large in the distance as he finds the monument he was looking for.

Engraved on the front “ここに北条の勇敢な戦士がいます” (Here lies the brave warriors of Hojo).

Tenchu drops to his knees, and lays his sword before him in honour to his comrades. He claps twice before lowering his head.

Banzan ] “Showing honour to those you have disgraced with your actions. I’m sure they’re not very proud of a warrior like yourself.”

Tenchu stands, rage flowing through his robotic form as he grabs his sword.

Tenchu ] “How do you know so much about my clan, Monk?”

Banzan pulls out a scroll that bears the symbol of the Odawara clan. Tenchu recognizes the scroll immediately and takes a step back.

Banzan ]“This.”

Banzan pulls out a scroll.

Banzan ]“You know what this is, don’t you?”

Tenchu ] “It’s the scroll that covers the laws and behaviours of all of us that call Odawara home.”

Banzan ] “I have read this, multiple times. Making sure I knew every word of it. Like you used to, apparently.”

Banzan hands the scroll to Tenchu.

Tenchu ] “I know every word of this, Monk. It’s programmed into me, and I honour it every day.”

Banzan grins at this as he takes the scroll back.

Banzan ] “Really? Every word of it? What does it say about striking down defenceless men?”

Tenchu glares at Banzan, knowing full well what he is going for.

Tenchu ] “Callihan deserved what he got. He looked to dishonour me and my clan.”

Tenchu states as he walks away from Banzan. The Mountain grabs his arm, spinning the Metal Shadow around.

In the blink of an eye, Tenchu draws his sword and swings it at the neck of Banzan.

Cut.

 

 

 

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THE MID-CARD
STANDARD MATCH
RASPUTIN vs. ISRAEL GRIMWOLF

The streets meet the high seas as two scrappy fighters meet tonight. A huge chance for Rasputin, if he can put the Double Feature Champion away he’ll surely make a splash!

The match begins with both men meeting in the centre of the ring and exchanging blows. GRIMWOLF RAKES THE EYES OF RASPUTIN, BLINDING HIM… BUT RASPUTIN REACHES OUT AND SCRATCHES HIS NAILS DOWN THE CHEEN OF THE PIRATE! Both men stagger back but GRIMWOLF DROPS RASPUTIN WITH A NECK BREAKER!

Grimwolf grabs Rasputin by the scruff of the neck, pulling him to his feet by the hair… RASPUTIN KICKS FORWARD AND CATCHES ISRAEL IN THE STOMACH! He’s on his feet in a flash, dashing across the ring and rebounding off the ropes. RUNNING KNEE STRIKE TAKES DOWN GRIMWOLF!

Rasputin is rolling, feeling the momentum. He waits until Grimwolf rises groggily to his knees. TRIPPIN’ THE RIFT! KNEE STRIKE JUST SCRAMBLED GRIMWOLF’S BRAIN! Rasputin covers the Champ… ONE! TWO! NO! GRIMWOLF KICKS OUT JUST IN TIME! THE ANGEL OF DIRT IS GOING TO NEED MORE!

Rasputin pulls Grimwolf to his feet again, the Pirate groggily swinging but missing wildly. Rasputin Elbow Strikes Grimwolf, sending him wobbling back first into the turnbuckle, then charges at Grimwolf… RASPUTIN COMES FOR HIM BUT RUNS STRAIGHT INTO A ROARING ELBOW! KEELHAULED AT FULL SPEED! Grimwolf falls onto Rasputin for the cover ONE! TWO! THREE!

Grimwolf puts away the Angel of Dirt tonight. The Double Feature Champion proving why he’s got the gold!

 

WINNER: ISRAEL GRIMWOLF

 

 

 

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“FUCK THEIR WORLD”
FEATURING
JET SET RADIO & SIMON

Previously Recorded.

Sodapop Frequency.

A cross somewhere between an indoor skatepark and a college dorm, the Sodapop Frequency is Jet Set Radio’s base of operations. With a healthy collection of halfpipes, bowls, and kickers, it’s any thrill seeker’s dream hangout.

Sat off to the side we find a grouping of couches around a cable spool acting as a makeshift table, a box of borderline overloaded pizza sitting on it, all three members of Jet Set Radio sat around it.

Ether is chowing down on the pizza, Wiz is smoking a joint, and Tag is fruitlessly trying to tape his board back together.

Tag ] “So then he takes my tape with him after talking shit about analog! What’s he even gonna do with it if he doesn’t have a VHS player?”

Wiz ] “You think he’s got one, like, built into his head?”

Tag ] “Nah, but I heard his asshole has an SD slot.”

Wiz laughs, letting out a plume of smoke before looking to Ether.

Wiz ] “What about you? How’d going to visit fire crotch go?”

Ether downs her slice of pizza with impeccable speed, Wiz looking down past his glasses in amazement.

Wiz ] “I ain’t ever gonna get used to how fast you do that shit.”

Ether ] “Pyre? I got treated to seeing her ass get sprayed down prison style by some guards. I don’t know what y’all were up to but I had fun.”

Tag ] “Prison style you say?”

Before Tag can get the three of them even further off track the sound of a door opening gets their attention. Walking from the far side of the station is none other than Simon himself.

Tag ] “Mr. Simon Says. Thanks for that thing you threw my way.

The Taskmaster looks JSR up and down, adjusting his coat before speaking.

Simon ] “Of course. And I see you three made yourselves at home. But I’m afraid we have some… pressing matters to attend to.”

Ether ] “Like getting some payback on some mother fuckers?”

Simon nods his head.

Simon ] “Exactly. I knew they’d be coming for us, so I prepared myself for Storm. I’ll be dealing with him personally. As for the rest of you, I have some ideas…”

Wiz takes a puff from his joint, smirking as he lazily gets to his feet.

Wiz ] “No need. This ain’t our first turf fight, ya dig? We know how to deal with posers.”

Ether kips up to her feet, nodding her head with a devious grin. She’s soon followed by Tag who’s finished taping up his board.

Tag ] “Which means we’ll do what we’re best at.”

Simon ] “And what would that be?”

Ether can’t help but chuckle as she skates by Simon, turning back to him with a smirk.

Ether ] “We’re gonna fuck their world.”

Cut.

 

 

 

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“SSSSSSS”
FEATURING
VIPER ROBERTS

Flashback.

It’s pitch black.

There’s a singular light inside a room we’ve never seen before and can barely see now. The light illuminates a large oak table with a Viper logo carved into the centre.

It’s then that Viper Roberts’ face comes into view, beneath the light.

Viper Roberts ] “Welcome to The Snake Pit.”

He grins.

Viper Roberts ] “I must admit, I was surprised to receive your call. It isn’t every day a person like you agrees to become a snake.”

There’s a pause. The person he’s talking to isn’t replying. They’re silent.

Viper Roberts ] “There’s a price to follow me and receive my guidance. You want my help, then you have to pay that price.”

He pushes a plastic cup across the table in front of him. The liquid within is a dark green, almost black, and seems thick and putrid.

Viper Roberts ] “Drink me in and our souls will be bound for all eternity. Then and only then will you receive guidance from the Viper and have the answers you seek in perpetuity.”

Finally, a soft spoken whisper can faintly be heard as the person reaches out and picks up the cup.

Unknown ] “What is this?”

Their question isn’t appreciated. Viper’s face turns from a wanting smile to an angry grimace.

Viper Roberts ] “It’s the price of admission. If you want to become a snake and have my love, my warmth, my help and my guidance, this is what you must do. Now drink it, or forever leave this place.”

The person hesitates but puts the cup to their mouth. We hear the slurping as they down it as fast as they possibly can.

Viper Roberts ] “Give it a moment and you’ll feel it.”

Suddenly, the person drops the cup on the table.

They pause.

It’s like something has come over them. The tension in the room dissipates, as if it no longer exists.

Unknown ] “I can feel your love, Viper. I can feel your warmth in my soul.

Viper Roberts ] “That’s wonderful. Now, let’s talk about what you can do for me, shall we?.”

Who the fuck has joined Viper Roberts snakes?

Who just sold their soul to the devil and what the hell is in that liquid?

Cut.

 

 

 

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THE MID-CARD
STANDARD MATCH
CORVUS vs. LUCY SEREPHINA

Blade clashes against blade here as the crow of death itself faces an undead angel in a battle of contract supremacy.

The bell sounds as both speedsters rush forward, Corvus going high, Lucy going low as they miss contact, both bouncing off the ropes but Lucy manages to side step the Crow’s high kick attempt, stunning him with an elbow to the gut before gripping him around the head.

VAMPIRE’S BLOOD! The swinging neckbreaker hits flush but Lucy doesn’t go for a cover, instead bending down as she tries to lock in Malice’s Bite. The Crow slips out, taking Lucy’s breath away with a stiff strike to the throat before leaping up onto the shoulders of the stunned Angel

CUT THROAT DRIVER! The Hurricanrana Driver hits hard as Lucy crashes to the mat holding her neck in pain. She slowly gets up to her feet into an onrushing Corvus with leaps up high, BLACK HAND’S BL…Lucy slips out of the RKO, delivering a stiff kick to the head that staggers the Crow back.

A leaping DDT spikes Corvus to the mat before Luce circles behind, stalking Corvus for the killing blow. Grabbing Corvus by the back of the mask, she tries to pull him down into Fallen Sorrow but Corvus slips out, quickly locking in the GARROTE! Lucy tries to struggle but it’s locked in tight as she’s forced to tap out!

The Crow picks up the big victory here as Death has domain even over those who have allready fallen.

 

WINNER: CORVUS

 

 

 

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“EMPIRE OF DIRT”
FEATURING
RASPUTIN & LUCY SERAPHINA

We open to Rasputin looking at the remains of yet another dead bum, anger still in his eyes. That’s the third one in a week, killed and dumped carelessly around this new Skid Row.

Rasputin ] “Now who the fuck did this to you, my friend? Who thought you so worthless as to kill you and abandon you?

From the shadows, a slight giggle is heard. Almost a taunt that gets Rasputin’s attention.
Lucy Seraphina

The Angelic Assassin steps out from the shadows, a glint in her eye as she looks at the King of Dirt.

Lucy Serephina ] “Maybe they were just a message to you and your kind. You’re not welcome here.”

Rasputin looks the intruder up and down. He’s not impressed one bit by the presence of the Sovereign of Silence.

Rasputin ] “Yeah? And who the fuck are you?”

Seraphina grins a sinister grin as she sees the Homeless Saviour step up to her.

Lucy Serephina ]”I’m going to be the reason you’re little empire of dirt here crumbles. You’re not worthy of these halls, and you’re nothing more than food for someone like me.”

Rasputin swings at the head of the Angel of Silence, which is easily dodged.

Lucy Serephina ] “Please. You think a peasant like you is worthy of fighting me in such a garbage location?

Rasputin ]”You’re damn right, bitch!”

Before he can swing again Lucy has disappeared back into the shadows. From the shadows, though, her voice rings out one more time.

Lucy Serephina ] “Meet me at ReVolt.”

Cut

 

 

 

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“FUNK THE WORLD”
FEATURING
ALBERT SHAW & WIZ

Albie Shaw lies on his back facing the ceiling. He puffs hard.

The camera zooms out and we can see he is at the gym, working on his bench press. Presumable preparing for his next big fight.

Albert Shaw ] “One…Two… Three… Fo-”

He’s interrupted by the crack of something heavy hitting his elbow. The weights fall onto his chest where they are then held in place.

By Wiz.

Wiz ] “Afternoon Albert, thought I’d pay a guy a visit.”

Wiz rubs his arm.

Wiz ] “You see, man, I didn’t like your tone last week, ya dig? I thought you needed some sorta education. So here I am. You can call me Mr. Wiz.”

Albert Shaw ] “What the f-”

Wiz interrupts his spluttered rant.

Wiz ] “Nuh-uh, no talking while class is in session. You said last time we met that there were two types of digging, and you were only interested in one kind. Digging my grave. Well, Albert, I think that’s very sad. I think you’re a sad kinda guy, and I just wanted to teach you the way. The way of digging I prefer. Except I tend to call it tripping.”

Wiz smiles.

Wiz ] “I grew up with Bootsy Collins but my parent’s might be the ones I introduce you too, man. I don’t know if you heard of them but I should definitely hook you up with some of their wares. Man you’ll see things you’ve never seen. Feel things you’ve never felt. And maybe then you’ll not want to kill everyone you meet. Try it Albert.”

He pauses for effect.

Wiz ] “You’re much too “fuck the world”, and not enough “FUNK the world”, you dig?”

And with that, Wiz loosens his grip on the bar and disappears, leaving Shaw to shrug the weights off his chest and regain his breath.

Cut.

 

 

 

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THE MID-CARD
STANDARD MATCH
CHRONOA vs. CAEL GABLE

Will Chronoa’s encyclopedic knowledge of OSW’s past help her defeat a former Olympian Gold Medalist?

Gable wastes no time and ducks under Chronoa, grappling her from behind and throwing her to the mat stomach first! He mounts her from behind and spins around on her back before stepping back and raising his arms towards the crowd to a chorus of boos.

Chronoa steps up to Gable and they tie up collar-and-elbow. Gable again slips behind Chronoa into a rear grapple, but this time… GERMAN SUPLEX! Gable maintains the grapple on Chronoa and rolls through—GERMAN SUPLEX—NO! Chronoa backflips and lands on her feet!

Chronoa tackles Gable into the corner—KNEE TO THE FACE! Chronoa lifts the dazed Gable onto the top turnbuckle, and before he can gather himself his face meets Chronoa’s crotch…DEJA VU—SPERO’S ETERNAL SPRING INTO A PIN!! ONE! TWO!! GABLE KICKS OUT!! But Chronoa stays mounted on his chest and starts unloading right and left hand punches to Gable’s face over and over again!

Gable shields his face but Chronoa hops off him and yells to rally the crowd as she circles the ring… but Gable quickly rushes at her and lunges—SANDY ROGERS’ FEELING BLUE!! Chronoa palmstrikes the oncoming Gable with a puppet that she just pulled out of her skirt, stunning him to his knees—YOUR DEMISE!! Spinning elbow to Gable’s skull base—HAS ALREADY BEEN WRITTEN!!! Cover—ONE! TWO!! THREE!!!

The Olympian’s move set has been added to Chronoa’s databank, providing the knowledge she needed for victory!

 

WINNER: CHRONOA

 

 

 

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“WHERE THE WIND BLOWS”
FEATURING
CHRONOA & THE IMPALER

The match is over, and Gable has already left the ring when suddenly…darkness.

A rushing wind blows through, a voice calling to Chronoa from the distance.

The Impaler ] “Let us finish this business now, O Harbinger of Fate.”

A moment later…he appears.

The Impaler, standing toe to toe with Chronoa in the middle of the ring.

And this is met with…a smirk on Chronoa’s face?

Chronoa ] “Well this is amusing, Legion. Have you come to threaten me?”

The frustration, muted as it might be, is still quite visible on the face of The Impaler.

Chronoa ] “You think I didn’t see this coming? History always has a nasty habit of patterns that repeat over and over again, patterns that I’ve had to analyze to prepare for what awaits.”

The Impaler ] “And what, pray tell, awaits me? What brings you into my path…into striking distance?”

This draws a slight chuckle from the Keeper of History, much to Legion’s chagrin.

Chronoa ] “I know you far greater than you realize. For ages, you have lured foes into a trap…but you have never faced someone capable of reading the blueprint beforehand.”

The gravity of this resonates with the Dread Pirate Roberts of Pro Wrestling, who face reveals a hint of concern…before giving a smirk of his own.

The Impaler ] “I suppose that means changing things up, then.”

This only further amuses Chronoa, however.

Chronoa ] “That’s more like it.”

The Impaler rushes at Chronoa, looking for the element of surprise…but in the blink of an eye, Chronoa manages to evade and disappear, forcing Legion to consider a new strategy in tackling this challenge.

Cut.

 

 

 

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“SOLITARY”
FEATURING
ETHER

Hell’s Mouth Maximum Security Prison.

Ether ] “Come on… Why all the fuckin’ hoops? It wasn’t this hard to get in last week. I just want to see my…. friend.”

Ether’s impatient voice is matched with her fingers drumming on the administration desk. The receptionist looks somewhat flustered, her fingers darting across the keys.

[Receptionist] “I’m sorry, I have no more information. I just cannot allow any visitors to see that inmate at present.”

Ether sighs, casting her eyes across the desk.

Ether ] “Well, I’ve come all this way. I’m not going away empty handed. You gonna eat that sandwich?”

Before the receptionist can respond, another figure enters the scene and takes over from the poor girl.

[Warden] “I’m Warden Roberts, I run this place. Follow me and we can talk privately about the answers you seek.”

He ushers Ether away to an office, holding the door open for her. The Warden sits behind his large desk and speaks before Ether can reiterate her question.

[Warden] “The reason that visitation is restricted for that particular inmate is that she has been placed in solitary after that stunt last week.”

Ether nods, trying to feign empathy but a smirk forming on her face begins to give her away.

Ether ] “So she’s locked in a little box by herself?”

Her smirk forms more solidly on her face. The Warden notices and chuckles.

[Warden] “I’m sensing that you’re not here as a friend, but more to rub salt on the wounds…”

Ether’s lack of response confirms the suspicions.

[Warden] “Well, let’s just say solitary for our friend Pyre is a little more fun than usual. Picture a tank, filled with water, controlled to a temperature slightly below the body’s internal temperature. Just enough to feel… uncomfortable. Now picture Pyre suspended in that tank, so that only her head is above the water.”

Ether’s smirk turns into a full-blown smile as the Warden speaks.

[Warden] “She’s not going anywhere anytime soon. And rest assured, we’re doing everything here to ensure her life is a living hell. She should be out of solitary and a little more docile by next week.”

Ether nods, smiling and shaking the Warden’s hand.

Ether ] “Perfect. The others will be over the moon to hear about how well you’re looking after her”

Cut.

 

 

 

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THE MID-CARD
STANDARD MATCH
ALBERT SHAW vs. THE GENERATION KID

The ultimate underdog strides into battle once more against possibly his deadliest foe in the Guv’nor. Does the Kid truly have the power or will the deadly former champion beat some sense into him?

The bell sounds as Shaw rushes forward, trying for a throat crushing Lariat but TGK slides under, clipping Shaw with a sneaky elbow to the back of the head before taking him Back To the Future for a one count. Shaw stumbles to his feet, trying for a wild right but TGK ducks it, delivering a very Transformative Inside Cradle for a one…two count this time.

TGK rolls back, rushing forward with all the force of a Delorean but the oncoming spear is met with a brutal boot to the jaw before he’s nearly damn driven through the mat with a spinebuster. Shaw mounts the dazed kid, delivering not one, not two, not five but ten devastating elbows as he shows how Snitches Get Stitches to the newbie.

Albie pulls TGK up off his feet, driving him up high with knee after knee to the midsection but as he tries to throw him over his head with a belly to belly suplex, TGK manages to land on his feet before rearing up as Shaw turns around, Crane Kick Karate Kid Style!

TGK looks for the end, pulling Shaw up but gets a brutal headbutt for his efforts. The Kid’s out on his feet as Shaw backs up, looking for that killing blow as he rushes forward. GRIEVOUS BODILY HARM! That kick may have knocked the kid back a few decades as Shaw covers for the one…two…three

Albie Shaw picks up a big victory over a game TGK here but no man or kid can survive the GBH

 

WINNER: ALBERT SHAW

 

 

 

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“FIRST DATE”
FEATURING
ZERO & TAG

An abandoned warehouse.

The glow from Zero’s glasses light the area as he walks through the drafty hall. He rounds a corner with fists clenched, but pauses when he sees an empty area with two things in the middle.

A box.

And the taped up skateboard of Tag.

Oh yeah, there’s a third thing.

A giant fucking electromagnet.

Zero ] “Fuck me.”

With a woosh, the electromagnet powers up, and the hacker is flung across the room to be stuck on it.

Just as Tag rounds the corner with a smile.

Zero ] “Daddy Simon build that for you?”

Sexy Dynamite shakes his head, walking up to his foe.

Tag ] “You really think I’m an idiot, don’t you?”

Zero ] “Yes”

No hesitation.

Tag ] “Doesn’t take an idiot to know you wouldn’t give Cassandra back unless you’d left a little tracker. So I thought I’d leave it as bait.”

Sexy Dynamite walks up and knocks on the hacker’s head.

Tag ] “Digital bitches like you always trust your shit.”

Zero ] “Fuck off, punk. Let me off this magnet, and your humpty dumpty ass won’t be able to tape yourself back up again!”

A smile is the only response and Tag picks up Cassandra.

Tag ] “I’d love to take you up on that, but Cassandra’s taken enough of a beating.”

He tosses the skateboard to the side, reaching into the box beside it.

A new skateboard appears in his hand. Beautifully crafted.

Tag ] “Custom made from head to toe. Her name’s Chelsea.”

Zero stops struggling against the magnet to laugh.

Zero ] “So you a Lou Bega bitch? How many names you got? Looks like I’ll have to up my body count at Revolt.”

The smile drops from Tag as he sneers at Zero.

Tag ] “You know, Chelsea was my second choice. But I figured I’d get my hands on a live Pam soo…”

CRASH! ZERO THROWS THE MAGNET ACROSS THE ROOM, FINALLY CONQUERING IT!

IT WRECKS THROUGH A WALL, AND TAG GETS THE FUCK OUT OF DODGE!

The angry Zero takes a deep breath as he checks his cybernetic implants.

Still working.

Zero ] “You better run, kid. First date’s coming up, and Zero’s only got one thing on his mind.”

Cut.

 

 

 

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THE MID-CARD
STANDARD MATCH
DEATHNOTE vs. WIZ

The Sultan of Funk challenges The Author of Death. Is the pen mightier than the scooter? Let’s find out…

Deathnote is in the ring waiting. Wiz bursts down the ramp on his scooter and up another, flying over the tope, swinging his deck around several times, the Sultan of Funk lands a missile dropkick to the chest of the Author of Death. The scribe stumbles backwards on to the ropes, Wiz leaps but Deathnote rolls away and The Purple Pelican hangman’s himself on the top rope.

Deathnote scoops up Wiz…GATHER THY SOUL!!! Cover for ONE….TWO….KICKOUT!!! The Shinigami drags up the JSRer…TAPDANCE FUNK!!! Wiz counters with an enziguri. The party animal pulls out a can of spray paint….CANNED HEA-DROP TOE HOLD!!! Deathnote counters. The bookholder climbs to the top rope…KISS OF DEATH

HE BOMBS!!! Wiz flips up and hits THE BOOM BOOM float over DDT. Legs hooked….ONE…TWO…THREE-NO! SHOULDER UP!!! Now it’s Wiz’s turn to climb the turnbuckles. He puts his back to the ring…BOOTSY CONNECTION!!! It’s ugly as hell as Wiz misses his target and lands on his neck.

Rising, Wiz looks dazed. Deathnote like a runaway train…RUNNING STO!!! Wiz folds like a deck chair. Is this it? ONE! TWO! THREE….NO!!! KICKOUT!!! Deathnote drags up Wiz but the Jet Setter TURNS THE PAGE!!! on Deathnote. Wiz goes high….ELECTRIC FREEBIRD and cover for ONE….TWO…..THREE!!!!

Wiz leaves his tag all over the Shinigami!

 

WINNER: WIZ

 

 

 

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“SWEET?”
FEATURING
KAINE KNIGHTLORD & MORDECAI

We see Mordecai sittimg down on a bench in the hallways of The Slaughterhouse. He looks deeply focused.

He’s shoved against the wall and shaken hard!

He’s startled and looks up.

It’s Kaine Knightlord!

Kaine Knightlord ] “What have you done to me!?”

Mordecai ] “What are you talking about?”

Kaine Knightlord ] “I asked for dreams but everytime I sleep, I don’t see the people I miss. I see the people I killed and the dreams they had before they met me and their end.”

Mordecai ] “Did you think you could control them? Do you even remember what it’s like to be human?”

Kaine Knightlord ] “That’s what I came to you for in the first place. I want to see the things I don’t fully remember. The buildings that long since fallen, more than outlines of the faces I loved. I thought I could potentially clear away the smoke and defeat that classical obscurer known as time. I’ve lived multiple lifetimes now and whilst my body doesn’t feel it, my mind is beginning to. You brought up controlling them, is there any potential in that?”

Mordecai ] “I brought it up to remind you of the manner of dreams and how they fight against the human and I guess vampire condition to want to control everything. However, there is a way you can have a semblance of control in the dream realm. You have to learn it on your own. The only hint I’ll give you is to research lucid dreaming and be aware of when you are dreaming as opposed to just feeling it.”

Kaine Knightlord ] “What if I can’t?”

Mordecai ] “If you can’t learn how to lucid dream, you’re going to have to learn to deal with them as everyone else has to. Let them happen, don’t put so much pressure on your mind and its new ability. Everyone has good dreams and everyone, much to my chagrin, has nightmares. Enjoy the good and don’t sweat the bad. Remember, you asked for this but dreams deal with the subconscious and you have a lot buried within that mind. I can’t tell you how it’s all going to appear. I can just tell you, good luck.”

Kaine nods and walks away.

Cut.

 

 

 

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“AS I LAY DYING”
FEATURING
LUKE STORM & SIMON

Luke Storm.

The A-lister is white as a ghost, sweat pouring from his face as he tries to navigate from the backstage to the entrance ramp. However, just as he gets to the end of the hallway he slumps against the wall, clutching his stomach in what could only be sheer agony.

Simon ] “Having some trouble there, Lucas?”

The ever smug voice of Simon travels through the air, smacking Luke Storm right in the face. The ego would be enough to make him puke, but it’s clear that Storm is already on his way to doing just that anyway.

Storm grits his teeth, looking towards Simon as The Taskmaster walks past him, smirking.

Hollywood Luke Storm ] “I’ve been sick all week. What the fuck did you do to me?”

Simon ] “Me? Oh, Luke, I didn’t do a single thing. Truly, you did this to yourself. Did you enjoy the whiskey? I knew it was your favorite.”

Luke’s eyebrows raise, his eyes widening behind his glasses at the mention of whiskey. Before he can say anything however Simon cuts him off.

Simon ] “Oh? Something dawning on you?”

Simon chuckles, strolling past the film star as he approaches the ring entrance. He turns back to Luke and gives him a cocky wink.

Simon ] “The whiskey you drank was dosed with an… interesting little bio-toxin. Sweating, vomiting, and weakness are just the minor effects. However, give it enough time, say a few weeks? They progress. Bleeding from the eyes, ears, mouth, peeling skin… and eventually? Death.”

At the mention of the last word Storm stumbles forward, Simon laughing at him as he goes to take his leave.

Simon ] “I have an antidote. Let’s just hope I remember to give it to you. I can’t help but believe my dear wife would be furious if I let her little friend die.”

With that, Simon enters the arena, leaving Storm to struggle to stand.

Cut.

 

 

 

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THE MID-CARD
TRIPLE THREAT MATCH
BANZAN vs. LUKE STORM vs. SIMON

As Banzan and Simon stand in the ring, the referee looks for Luke Storm. Just as he begins to call for a no contest Storm stumbles to the ring, sliding in and getting to a knee.

Storm shouldn’t be here! He can hardly stand and Simon take advantage! CATALAN OPENING! KNEE TREMBLER TO A KNEELING STORM! Luke is floored in the corner and Simon turns around INTO THE DUKKHA! SAITO SUPLEX BY BANZAN! The Mountain refuses to attack storm, going on the offense against The Taskmaster!

Banzan grabs Simon and Biel tosses him across the ring! Simon gets up just to get floored with a massive clothesline! He goes to grab him again AND GETS CAUGHT BY A BRASS KNUCKLED CLAD FIST! SIMON KNOCKED BANZAN ON HIS ASS! The Mountain goes down! LIGHTNING STRIKE! STORM OUT OF NOWHERE WITH A SUPERKICK!

The Tempest collapses onto Banzan to try and score a pin! But The Mountain throws him off with ease! Storm lands face first and tries to push to his feet! ONLY TO VOMIT ONTO THE MAT! STORM IS SICK AS A DOG! He can’t stand up! He falls face first into his own bile!

Banzan gets to his feet, glancing towards Storm before looking to Simon! The Mountain backs up and calls for the end! Simon slowly gets to his feet! AND GETS CAUGHT WITH THE MAGGA! NO! SIMON DUCKS AND SENDS BANZAN OVER THE ROPES TO THE OUTSIDE! Simon watches Banzan tumble down before walking over to storm and kicking him onto his back and placing a foot on his chest! ONE! TWO! THREE!

The bell rings, and Simon stomps a mudhole into Storm! The Taskmaster finishes his assault when the official pulls him away, exiting the ring with a smile on his face!

 

WINNER: SIMON

 

 

 

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“THE MEANING OF”
FEATURING
CAEL GABLE, DEATHNOTE, CORVUS & SIGIL

Backstage.

Cael Gable is understandably walking with a purpose. During the dream sequence in which he was eventually dumped overboard by Viper Roberts, Deathnote had a few choice things to say.

Now, he enters the boiler room in search for The Author.

As he does, he passes a hall of candles, leading to an altar that obviously belongs to Deathnote. His book rests upon it. Gable approaches, looking around to check the coast is clear, before attempting to touch the book.

Deathnote ] “I wouldn’t do that if were you.”

The abrupt voice of Deathnote startles the Olympian into stopping himself. The Author then steps out of the darkness before the altar.

Cael Gable ] “We need to talk.”

Deathnote ] “I knew you’d come; but my answer from the dream is the same today as it was then.”

That frustrates Gable.

Cael Gable ] “You need to tell me what the fuck you meant, Deathnote. I’m not playing games. You and the world saw what I was capable of with Grimwolf. Don’t fuck with me.”

His harsh tones shock everyone, including the Author – but it doesn’t change his mind.

Deathnote ] “You’ve changed, haven’t you?”

Cael Gable ] “No shit, Sherlock. I’m fed up with being the one to suffer for everyone else’s whims and desires. Red Snow was my come to Jesus moment.”

Deathnote steps around the altar to face Cael Gable head on.

Deathnote ] “If you think right now is another one of those, take your shot.”

There’s a pause.

Gable suddenly swings.

PORTAL.

WHOOSH!

In an instant, Cael Gable is dragged through a portal by Sigil, almost mid-swing. Deathnote is left behind, chuckling to himself.

Deathnote ] “You can stop hiding, Crow.”

After a moment, Corvus steps out of the shadows.

Corvus ] “I was hoping we could talk.”

Deathnote shakes his head, walking back to his altar.

Corvus ] “I want to know if Sigil’s name is in your book?”

The Author stops dead in his tracks.

Deathnote ] “You shouldn’t ask such questions; they’re above your paygrade.”

Corvus ] “What if I was to tell you that someone in our match couldn’t be trusted. Would that buy some informational favour with you?”

Deathnote ] “I’m listening.”

In an instant, we’re suddenly transported to a different part of the arena where Cael Gable comes swinging with a right handed air punch through a portal, only to met by Sigil.

The Collector stands before him, arms folded.

Cael Gable ] “What the hell are you doing? I was about to…”

Sigil interrupts.

Sigil ] “You walked into the lions den, demanding the lion heel. All that was gonna happen is that you wouldn’t make it to Revolt.”

Cael folds his arms in frustration, mirroring Sigil.

Cael Gable ] “That’s my prerogative.”

Sigil ] “Not when you’re on my team, it’s not. I need to beat Deathnote, Corvus, Grimwolf and Voynich. In fact, if you ever want into the World Championship picture, then so do you. You’re new to being an asshole, so I’ll give you that – but don’t fuck with my plans, or I will drop you through a portal into oblivion itself.”

Gable gulps.

Cut.

 

 

 

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THE MAIN EVENT
TRIPLE THREAT TAG TEAM MATCH
VAYIKRA vs. JET SET RADIO (TAG & ETHER) vs. VIGOUR & STARBOY

It’s time for your main event of the evening, triple threat tag action between three up and coming teams in OSW! Will the mission of Vayikra be seen through here, or will either Jet Set Radio or the team of Vigour and Starboy snuff out their flame?

Darkness. The heavy guitar chords and smashing drums of RED’s “The War We Made” begin playing over the speakers.

A lone spotlight shines down upon the entrance stage. There, kneeling in prayer with the Rewind Championship draped across the ground in front of him is Sir Bellator … and kneeling beside him, Sir Renault with his head down, and his hands clasped over the top of his upright pernach in front of him.

‘Hear a voice when the light is gone
Never know whose side it’s on
Think you’re gonna see someone
But you are the only one’

A curtain of golden pyro showers down on Bellator and Renault, and they stand into the brilliant light it creates, Bellator housing his Championship Belt onto his shoulder before the pair make their way to the ring.

‘Waking up from myself
To a life outside this hell
No more lies, no more pain
You can’t fight the war we made
The war we made’

Sir Bellator climbs the turnbuckle when he enters, making the sign of the cross over his chest as Renault poses like a cross in the middle of the ring, Bellator backflipping into the ring and handing his belt across to the official in waiting.

Suddenly, “We Won’t Cooperate” by Brawl Stars & Bad Random plays as Tag and Ether step out, looking cocky as ever as Tag takes a ride toward the ring on his skateboard beside Ether on her skates. The two don’t waste any time making their way to the ring, causing a bit of mischief as they taunt Vayikra inside the ring.

“The future is bulletproof.
The aftermath is secondary.
It’s time to do it now, and do it loud.
Killjoys, make some noise.”

The the heavy crash of drums and lilt of the guitar lick hit the speakers and the crowd is bathed in a writhing pulse of colour as the spotlights cycle through the colour spectrum until…

The opening riffs of “Careless Whisper” hit the sound system as the sweet, melodic sounds of saxophones echo throughout The Slaughterhouse. Smoke fills the entrance as pink lights wander around the venue. Out steps STARBOY wearing a pink spiked leather jacket with his LOVEstick in hand, twirling it around like a sword.

Vigour and Starboy make their way to the ring, eager to get into the action as quick as possible!

Starboy slowly slides into the ring and provocatively crawls on all fours while Vigour slides under the bottom rope, getting ready for the match ahead. STARBOY settles into a kneeling position and licks his LOVEstick from the base to the top while maintaining eye contact with the crowd before licking his lips and making a kissing motion to those in attendance.

The bell rings as we kick things off with Vigour and Ether focusing their attention on Renault, looking to stop the Last Crusader from the outset by rushing him with a flurry of offense!

Vigour gets some swift kicks on Renault, and Ether eventually sends him toward the ropes…but the size advantage is enough for Renault to knock her down with a clothesline on the rebound!

This prompts another attack by Vigour, but Renault is ready for the Prince of Party this time, walloping him with a haymaker that sends him reeling to the corner…where Starboy is waiting for the tag!

Here comes the Lover of All, but love is far from his mind in the moment as he goes after Renault, keeping Darth Jesus at bay with his unique offense culminating with a dropkick that sends Renault clear across the ring!

Starboy turns his attention to Ether, who is back on her feet with a tag to, well, Tag!

Sexy Dynamite takes it to Starboy, the two trading hard strikes until Starboy takes a knee…but all of this is usurped by the arrival of Sir Bellator, fresh off a tag from Renault with a running bulldog on Tag! Bellator goes for a cover here, looking for a quick win!

ONE!

NO!

Starboy already back to his feet, and he kicks the Templar square in the temple to break the pinfall!

Starboy stays on the attack with some hard kicks to keep the more nimble of the Crusaders at bay, but Bellator has other plans as he slams Starboy face-first into the canvas with a drop toe hold!

This gives Tag a chance to collect himself, which is bad news for Bellator as Mr. Money Shot gets all in his face, lifting the former Sanctus onto his shoulders…only for Bellator to slip out at the last second!

Tag turns his attention to the Templar, who catches him with a dropkick! Tag is down, but Starboy is back up…and connects with the Sling Blade on Bellator!

GANGBANGARANG!

Before Starboy can follow up, however, Bellator wisely rolls out of the ring as Ether is eagerly waiting to be tagged back in…and Tag obliges!

Ether is rip roarin’ and ready to go as she rushes Starboy, sending the Lover to the canvas with a dropkick that takes a little more damage due to her skates! Ether goes for a cover…but doesn’t even get a count of one before Bellator rushes in to break it up!

IMPER–NO!

Ether slips out, much to Bellator’s chagrin!

ETHER STRIKE!

Bellator took that spinning heel kick hard, forcing him back to his corner as Renault gets the tag!

But so too does Vigour…and now the party can really get started!

Vigour goes flying at Ether, but Renault intercepts with a powerslam! Turning his attention to the Bad Random, Renault is ready to swing things in his favor now…ONLY TO GET ROLLED UP BY VIGOUR!

ONE!

TW–NOOOOPE!

Renault doesn’t fall for the most dangerous maneuver in professional wrestling, kicking out with authority!

But Ether’s right back on the attack herself, gaining momentum as she skates to the ropes, launching herself at the Crusader just as he gets to his feet…connecting with a crossbody!

No time for a follow here, though, as Vigour shows the Hungry Girl just how hungry he can be with a series of strikes sending her to the corner!

Vigour immediately charges into the corner, connecting with a corner splash that sandwiches Ether into the turnbuckles…and follows up with a bulldog off the second rope!

Vigour is really feeling some kind of way here, looking to spice things up as he heads back to the turnbuckle, climbing up top and making good use of the opening available to him as he leaps off with a frog splash!

A SPLASH OF COLOUR!

BUT ETHER GETS THE KNEES UP!

The high risk maneuver doesn’t pay off for Vigour, clutching his ribs as he rolls toward the corner. Ether stands back up, but is immediately ambushed with a double-team by Vayikra!

The ref is doing all he can to control the situation, but it’s no use as Bellator connects with a heel kick of his own on Ether! Renault takes advantage of the opening by grabbing Ether, hoisting her up and over into a rolling German suplex!

He follows with a half nelson suplex, and finishes things off with a bridging dragon suplex!

HOLY TRINITY! ETHER’S SHOULDERS ARE STILL PINNED TO THE CANVAS!

ONE!

TWO!

THR–NO!

TAG MAKES THE SAVE FOR JSR!

And now chaos takes over, as Starboy runs into the ring leading to all six competitors having at each other, much to the ref’s dismay!

Absolute madness ensues, until Vigour and Starboy are able to fend off Bellator…only for Renault to send Starboy over the top rope to the outside! Ether gets to her feet, and JSR send the Crusader out of the ring…only for Vigour to take Tag out of the equation with a dropkick!

This leaves us with just Ether and Vigour…and the Prince of Party gets one over on Ether!

VIM AND VIGOUR!

Ether just got a Lumbar Check she won’t forget any time soon, as Vigour goes for the cover!

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!

Vigour and Starboy pick up a huge win in tonight’s main event, ruining JSR and Vayikra’s parties in the process!

 

WINNERS: VIGOUR & STARBOY

 

 

 

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“PARTY CITY”
FEATURING
VAYIKRA, SEESAW & PHINEAS MOODY

As suddenly as that match ended, it’s even more sudden when the screen shifts straight to somewhere else.

SeeSaw is sat in front of the same TV from last week.

“Did you prepare?”

The voice almost makes SeeSaw leap out of his chair in shock. Phineas Moody has appeared behind him.

SeeSaw ] “I went to Party City, but they didn’t have exactly what you asked for.”

He holds out a gaudy plastic bag. Moody, annoyed, looks inside.

Then he smiles.

FLASH!

We’re suddenly back at ringside. The match has just ended. Vayikra and the Rainbow Party are both still here.

The tension from last week is unresolved, and it looks ready to boil over.

But Phineas Moody and SeeSaw are now HERE.

With sudden force, they crash into Vayikra from behind! Rainbow Party scatters to the entrance aisle.

Phineas Moody ] “I told you the show would always go on, Renault!”

SeeSaw grabs Bellator, a faux apologetic look on his face.

SeeSaw ] Sorry, this party is going to be a little tacky!

He pours out the plastic bag on the mat.

Thumb fucking tacks.

This is about to get messy.

Moody picks up Sir Bellator, holding him over the sea of tacks while SeeSaw charges in.

SPIKE PILEDRIVER! THE BIG TOP DROP INTO THE TACKS!

SEESAW WITH THE JACK ATTACK! RAINING DOWN FISTS OF THUMBTACKED FURY ON THE EXPOSED SKIN OF SIR BELLATOR!

But here comes Sir Renault!

BUT NO! SEESAW HOISTS HIM UP ONTO HIS SHOULDERS! HE BEGINS TO SPIN DARTH JESUS AROUND IN CIRCLES, AND WHAT IS MOODY DOING?

OH FUCK ME, HE’S HOLDING THE TACKS UP WHILE SEESAW SWINGS HIM INTO THEM LIKE A DEMENTED GAME OF WHEEL OF FORTURE!

SeeSaw stops, both cackling with glee.

HE NAILS THE CUTTER! THE BIG WHEEL IS COMPLETED!

Having seen enough, Sir Vant ascends to the apron, and surprisingly, SeeSaw and Moody stop. Carnevil winks at Vant.

Phineas Moody ] “At Revolt, it’s time for you zealots to learn a thing or two, so come on down to the Nightmare Academy!”

With a flash, the pair vanish. Blood is streaked everywhere on the mat as Bellator and Renault try to pick the thumbtacks out of their punctured bodies.

Last week, we saw how sick Vayikra really is, but this week their dream may be ready to end.

And what did Moody call their alliance? The Nightmare Academy?

It’s a nightmare indeed if two of the sickest fucks in OSW history have aligned together. Moody hates humans, why is he even working with SeeSaw?

Nevertheless, at Revolt the bloody crusade of Vayikra is going to get even bloodier when they face a match that could only be made in the pits of hell!

Mercy is out of the question.

Survival is all they can pray for.

Cut.