[The Reverend, Lionel Troy, stands front and centre upon the stage of his Church – barefoot, and with his trousers rolled up to both knees.]
“Brothers and sisters… Is the muck and mire of life weighin’ you down?! Are you holdin’ onto guilt and shame like a heavy load on your shoulders?!”
“If so, you’ve come to the RIGHT place! For today we gather to celebrate the miraculous transformation that awaits each and every one of you through the sacred act… of BAPTISM!”
[The congregation gathered in front of the stage erupt into a joyous frenzy.]
“That’s right, believers… We are here today to share a profound and life-changin’ TRUTH! So, please, join me in showin’ your appreciation for Clara!”
“Give the girl a hand, ladies and gentlemen!”
[The Lion of Zion leads the applause for Clara who makes her way onto the stage.]
“Clara is in need of spiritual rebirth after openly admittin’ to losin’ her way in life! She came to me in faith and said: Preacher… RID me of the stains of my earthly existence!”
[Lionel turns to Clara, eyeing her up and down.]
“Now I know some of you might be thinkin’: But how could somethin’ so exquisite be so stained? Surely this fledglin’ beauty is the epitome of perfection?”
[A shake of the head.]
“Well, let me tell you somethin’, friends… We’ve all got a layer of FILTH on us! It might be lodged deep beneath the surface, but you can bet your last credit it’s there, and there’s only one way to SCRUB that dirt away!”
[Mama Troy’s Baby Boy takes Clara by the hand and leads her to one side, whereupon a trap door mechanically manoeuvres to reveal a baptismal pool built into the stage.]
“I’m not talkin’ about no Odyssey Pool, brothers and sisters! The pool I speak of is a divine act that goes BEYOND the mere physical cleanin’… It’s a sacred RITUAL that reaches into the depths of our souls and unveils the radiant beauty that lies within!”
[Troy steps into the pool and invites Clara to join him, positioning himself at her side].
“Baptism is the ULTIMATE makeover for your soul, dear flock! It’s like peelin’ away the layers of an onion to reveal the sweet, untouched core!”
[Lionel runs his hands up and down Clara’s semi-exposed body – almost pevertedly.]
“And oh, what a BEAUTIFUL core it is!”
[Suddenly and without warning, Troy plunges the girl backwards into the pool, swiftly returning her to an upright position].
“Now, Clara, Zion wants you to know the water in this pool is a river of pure, liquid GRACE! When you bathe in His water, you bathe in a river that washes away the evils of your past!”
YOUR PAST!
“Your mistakes!”
MISTAKES!
“And your regrets!”
OHHH, WASH THEM ALL AWAY, LORD!
[The Reverend Troy takes Clara by the hand once more and leads her to the side of the stage – smiling from ear to ear.]
“Brothers and sisters… Your beloved Reverend must now leave you to CONSUMMATE Zion’s work, but I leave you in the capable hands of Pastor Ramsey to continue the Good News!”
“THANK YOU!”
[Lionel leads Clara ominously away.]