Chained Up

In Promo by Tag

“Back when I was kid my hometown had these two mean ass dogs.”

“Though I guess every down had a house like that.”

“These dogs, they were fuckin’ vicious, man. Their owner, right? He kept them chained up outside of his house all day every day. Kids would avoid his yard like the fuckin’ plague.”

“And the kids who didn’t? They ended up bleedin’ in the grass with a chunk taken outta their face.”

“We all thought this dude had those dogs under his thumb.”

“UntilĀ  one day he didn’t.”

“The owner, see, he treated these dogs like shit. Hit them, kicked them, never even gave them a Scooby Snack for doing their job!”

“Nah, he just expected them to work and watch his yard without a second thought.”

“Well, one day? Those dogs realized they didn’t need to take that shit.”

“And they took a chunk outta his neck.”

“Sound familiar, Simon? C’mon man, you gotta know where this is going, right?”

“Think of OSW like it’s that dude’s house, his little castle where he spends his days in charge of every blade of grass. You don’t get on his lawn without his permission, and if you step outta line? Two mean fuckin’ dogs tear you up like Ether on a pizza.”

“I mean, look at Luke Storm? That dude got on your turf, literally, and you fed him to the dogs.”

“Zero? Same thing.”

“You got the keys to the castle, all the power you could want, and yet you’re sitting here not even giving a treat to the dogs you kept chained up in the lawn for so damn long!”

“Nah, they can just sit out there in the heat, take kicks from you and your girl, and thank you for the fact that you might’ve washed your boots that day.”

“Wanna know how I know that, Simon?”

“Because me and my friends? My dudes? My Brosiahs? We’re the fuckin’ dogs!”

“Now, Wiz is off doing his own thing, but Ether and I are still chained up here without a treat to eat or even something fun to sniff, man. Meanwhile you and Pyre are sitting pretty in your house, watching out the window and laughing at every last little shit we sink our teeth into.”

“Well maybe I’m tired of it.”

“Maybe when we get into the ring next week, when you step out onto the lawn to kick me and tell me to lay down?”

“Maybe I’m gonna fuckin’ snap and sink my teeth into a king for a change.”

“Ether might just be too hungry and scarf down some Pyre Ala Queen.”

“The chains are comin’ off, and the blood shed is comin’ on. I’m gonna tear you a new one just like those dogs did to their abusive owner back home.”

“But hey, give me a treat, and I might just be willing to let go of your throat.”

“Now do me a favor, Simon.”

“Put your head between my legs and kiss your win goodbye.”