Duct Tape

In Promo, Stubbins Doom by DOOM

[Doom sits on his factory floor, sifting through various broken equipment at the hands of Destructo Boy.]

“Look at it all in tatters.”

[He moves parts around.]


[Doom picks up a chipset and holds it to the light.]

“But sometimes, all that is broken is not lost.”

“When I look at this pile of broken machinery and parts, it reminds me of you, Mr. Cade. Upon first inspection, it looks like there’s nothing of great substance here.”

“Certainly, everything on the ground in front of me once represented a fully functional piece of equipment that served a purpose.”

“It meant something.”

[He tosses the chipset back into the pile.]

“Until someone came along and in a childish rage, broke it all.”

“You’ve been broken for a long time now, haven’t you? Jasper Redgrave dismantled you, piece by piece and left you as a pile of parts. You went from a highly functioning piece of equipment with laser focus to a broken and fractured mess.”

“Between what Redgrave did to you and your demotion from Eagle to mere beat cop, you’ve been utterly broken. To your credit, you’ve tried to piece yourself back together again. You’ve made an attempt to prove that you’re not as broken as you actually seem. I can see through that, but you may fool others.”

“That OSW World Heavyweight Championship for example, doesn’t fool anyone, Mr. Cade. Especially not me. It’s duct tape. It’s nothing short of a temporary remedy to a problem that it certainly cannot resolve. You can of course tape yourself back together, but that doesn’t mean you’re fixed.”

But you can be.

[Doom starts picking out pieces from the pile and moves to a workstation with them. He begins soldering them back together. Within ten minutes, he’s tweaking with wires and eventually, a make-shift drone powers back up.]

“I see potential in you. Whilst you stand before me as odds and sods, pieced back together by a desperate man who wishes nothing more than to be whole – we both know the truth, do we not?”

“And as you can see; there’s nothing I can’t fix.”

“That includes you, dear boy.”

[The drone begins flying away.]

“Our encounter next week need not be a brawl for the ages. You don’t need to prove something to me. You wouldn’t be able to pass for a functioning man in a proper match with DOOM, Mr. Cade. What I would ask is that you take your opportunity to pull up a chair, take a seat and pay attention.”

“I may just be able to unwrap the duct tape.”

“Because if there is anyone in Old School Wrestling who can help put humpty dumpty back together again, it’s not Harold Attano or Colt Ramsey; it’s me, DOOM.”

That will, certainly, appear to be true.

“Even if I have to break you further to prove it.”