In Promo by Sir Renault

The Holy Grail is thought to be the cup from which Jesus Christ drank at the Last Supper.

The chalice was also believed to be used by Joseph of Arimathea to collect Jesus’s blood at his crucifixion.

It is said that the vessel has magical properties. One legend has it that drinking from it will cure whatever it is that ails you, while another claims guzzling from the chalice grants immortality.

Many a man has had a go at retrieving the grail, and many a man has failed. The search for the grail has left no temple or cavern unturned.

Whether the Holy Grail is a real relic or a myth, and where it can be found, may only be known by a select few. However, the greediest of those who seek it continue the quest for the holiest of all artifacts to this day.

In fact, one of those sinners is among us in the Slaughterhouse.

Scouring realm after godforsaken realm, this man leaves no stone unturned in his never-ending quest for artifacts.

Claiming to be a scholar, he collects these items, taking them to his laboratory to examine and study them for their mystical and magical properties.

His endless, excessive pursuit of material goods has led him down a long, lonely road that only becomes more treacherous with each realm he depletes of artifacts.

For with each plane he walks upon, and with each item he steals for himself, the more attention he gains, and the more enemies he acquires.

His purpose is merely to fulfill his collection. But to what end will his greed be quenched?

In my realm, we call people like you sinners, Sigil. Or, more specifically, greedy bastards.

The final artifact you seek in this realm is the Holy Grail, and I know that for a fact because I have deciphered your true motivation.

You desire immortality.

You are just like the rest of those who have quested for ages: you’re relentless, you’re power-hungry, and you’re sick with the disease of obsession.

But at Retroshock, Vayikra has a cure for your illness.

We three good brothers will lead you down a better path towards Yahweh’s light.

It is there, at the end of this path, that you shall learn to put the desire of helping others above storing treasures up for yourself.

It is then that you may finally let your conduct be without covetousness, and just be content with the things you already have.

For Yahweh Himself will never leave you, nor forsake you, if you simply choose to follow His path.

But be warned—if you do not heed our charity towards you and enact it accordingly, an alternate path awaits you.

Vayikra will defeat you, Sigil. And after we nail you to the cross, it will be your blood we fill in our chalice.

Then, when Death himself resurrects Yahweh, you will be forced to watch us drink from the very grail that has been in your plain view this whole time.

And we will become what you’ve always wanted to be…


This is your last supper, Sigil.

Deus vult.