Iron Man

In Promo by Luke Storm

Y’all ever acted in an ensemble flick?

I thought not.

See, when you step onto set for a picture with a lot of moving pieces, you have to quickly learn your role.

Look at the Avengers.

Robert Downey Jr. is the man. Iron Man, in fact. He’s the star of the show, the guy front and center on the poster, and the one who gets the most screen time.

Now listen, everyone loves Chris Evans’ Captain America. But he’s not the star. He’s the 1A, the guy who could be the star of his own flick, but when the Avengers assemble it’s time to get in line.

Then you take your Mark Ruffalo or Chris Hemsworth types. They’re important: everyone loves Hulk and Thor. Yet everyone also knows that they’re supporting roles to the stars.

Because if you have too many people trying to be front and center, the whole thing falls to shit.

An ensemble movie just doesn’t work if people don’t know their roles.

That’s why this week’s box office ain’t gonna look how you expect it to.

It’s two juggernaut ensemble movies going toe to toe, but one of them is a bigger disaster than Joss Wheden’s Justice League.

Zero. Sigil. Corvus. Deathnote.

Look at those names. Feel the prestige behind them. Remember their accolades.

But it don’t mean shit in an ensemble picture if all of them think they’re going to be the goddamned Iron Man.

Zero’s my brother, Mr. Mother Fucker himself. The World fucking Champ. He should be front and center, leading that team like the top dog that he is.

But there’s no way his teammates let him.

Sigil’s used to forging his own path, of being the star of all of OSW. There ain’t no way he lets someone else stand on his ground.

Corvus operates by the beat of his own drum, and we’ve seen how well he works with others.

And Deathnote? Guy worships a fucking book that supposedly kills people.

You saw how well it worked on me. Just saying.

But we all know he ain’t taking orders from anyone.

So you got four prime bulls ready to fuck shit up, but they ain’t got no one to unite them.

Then you look at the other ensemble flick.

You got Sir Bellator, representing a real old school of though. Some fire and brimstone shit. He’s Thor, the heavy hitter ready to step in and wreck shit, but knowing that he’s third in line.

At best.

You got Simon, some kind of supposed genius. He ain’t Hulk, but we’ll take Bruce Banner. His smarts will come in handy, but he ain’t making the calls when the bell rings.

My girl Pyre is the 1A around here. She’s the lady in waiting, ready to stand tall when the moment comes. More than formidable, but she respects the guy at the top.


Because I started all this shit, didn’t I?

I’m the box office juggernaut. The star of the show. The Billion Dollar Man.

The Iron Man.

Luke Fucking Storm.

The Endgame is here, and I’ve only got two words for you.

Avengers. Assemble.