[Years Ago..]
“I won, I won!” [My excitement was infectious.] “Mom, I did it!”
[My mom stumbled out of the pantry holding bread, her eyes black and bloodshot. Her withered smile trembled falsely in my direction, pursing her split lip.]
“That’s wonderful, Felix!” [She bumbled nervously.]
“Mom….”
[She brushed me aside with a ruffle of the hair, putting the bread down on the table. I stood there with my cup, a trophy I’d won for a science competition in school. She picked up a knife and paused for a moment. There was trouble in the air, if even for a brief second, before she began to cut the bread.]
[I always wondered in that moment, what was she thinking?]
“Don’t let your pop find that cup, okay?” [She did her best to protect me the only way she could.] “You know what happens if he does.”
[I should’ve listened.]
[Later that night I headed into the kitchen for a drink and my father was sat at the dining room table, a glass of vodka in front of him.]
“What’s that?” [He asked, pushing the cup across the table towards me.] “Someone thought you good enough for a prize, is that it boy?”
[He scoffed at me. I shook my head, fear shivering down my spine.]
“It’s nothing pop…”
[That angered him. He stood up and snatched the cup from the table. My heart leapt into my throat, suffocating me.]
“Nothing, huh?” [He read it angrily.] “1ST place for scientific achievement. I suppose that makes you better than the rest of us, huh? Do you think you’re better than your old man?”
[I wanted to tell him that I was. I wanted to tell him that at least I didn’t beat my wife and son. I wanted to bravely snatch away my cup and break it over his face. I wanted. I wanted. I really really wanted.]
[But I did nothing.]
[I watched as he broke the cup by slamming it into the table.]
“This pathetic little cup doesn’t mean a thing, you little bastard. You’ll always be nothing.”
[Rise of the Spartan.]
[At the curtain, moments before I’m about to step out onto the entrance ramp. Moments before my music hits. Moments before I face my best friend in the quarter final of the Sparta Cup.]
[My chest thumps.]
[My heart races.]
[I can feel the pulse in my neck throb with every beat of my breaking heart. All I can remember is my pop breaking that cup on the table and yelling at me.]
“You’ll always be nothing.”
[Take a deep breath, Felix.]
“You’ll always be nothing.”
[Another deep breath.]
“You’ve got a friend in me
You’ve got a friend in me.”
[That’s my music.]
“Mr. Foley, are you ready?”
[I close my eyes.]
“That’s your music, Mr. Foley.”
[Go. C’mon Felix, go.]
“You’ll always be nothing.”
[I step powerfully through the curtain.]
“No I won’t, pop.” [Said aloud.] “No I fucking won’t.”
[The fans cheer.]