In Promo by Zero

“That bitch was a walking contradiction of who gives a fuck and what she wanted more than anythin’ was to fuck me.”

“I remember her whisperin’ in my ear at a Halloween party that she was a vampire who wanted to suck me dry and have me stake her, hard.”

“So, I took her up on it.”

“I took this bitch to the bathroom and let her suck me till I damn near fuckin’ bled.”

“I fucked her so hard, I drove my stake right through her God damn asshole.”

“She begged for it and she got it.”

“What I didn’t realize was that this bitch, she had someone in tow. She wasn’t alone. When I came out of that bathroom, this mother fucker swung on me. It was a setup.”

“And now here we are, and it seems like history is repeatin’ itself.”

“Lucy stands across the ring from me on Monday and you all know she’s gonna be whisperin’ sweet nothings in my ear, begging for me to stake her, just like I did the other bitch.”

“She thinkin’ that if she does that, I’mma let my guard down and Kaine Knightlord – the punk she came with, who somehow sucks more than she does, can swoop in and take my Tag Team Championships.”

“You know Lucy, if you ask – I’ll oblige.”

“I’ll throw some dick your way.”

“Fuck, we all know you ain’t gettin’ fucked properly by that pussy Kaine Knightlord.”

“He’s the only person on this roster who sucks more than you do.”

“But see, when I’m finished fuckin’ you with my big black stake – I’m gonna take my leave and you’re thinkin’ Knightlord will be there to beat me down and take our titles.”

“Except our titles don’t just belong to me, mother fucker.”

“I brought back up.”

“And whilst I’m fuckin’ you with my big stake, destroying your vampire pussy in the middle of that ring and any ring you fuckin’ got, my back up is gonna be teachin’ Kaine Knightlord how to fuck his own ass with his head.”

“See, we’re the bad mother fuckers, yo.”

“We fuck.”

“We don’t get fucked on.”

“On Monday, ya’ll about to fuck around and find out.”

“That’s fine by us.”

“I got a stake for you, vampire bitch. Come bite down on it, I dare ya.”