In Promo by The Generation Kid

“I once had a mountain of revision to do for tests.”

“I remember sitting at my desk, bopping my head to the newly released Jump by Van Halen, trying to find a way to focus on the task ahead of me.”

“It was hard, man.”

“I had a lot to do and if I wanted to be ready to take the tests, I needed to find a way to overcome this incredible mountain. It was going to take a plan. I couldn’t just dive in and tackle it; that wasn’t going to work.”

“If you try and go up a mountain unprepared, you may as well not go at all.”

“So, I began devising my plan.”

“I began sorting the things out that I needed to read, placing them into piles. I wrote a timetable of what I was going to read and when I was going to read it. I broke everything down into much more manageable piles of knowledge and then I systematically began undertaking it.”

“When I was finished, I had all the knowledge I needed, and I have revised everything on my agenda. I took the test a day later and I aced it.”

“You know Banzan, most people would just rock up to that test and try and take it. They might’ve aced other tests in the past and think this one couldn’t be as hard as that one, could it? They surely could achieve anything they want.”

“I’m not one of those people.”

“I took the test of Lambs to the Slaughter, and I aced it.”

“Facing you couldn’t be as hard as that, could it?”

“I’d be an idiot if I turned up at Fuck the World thinking that just because I’ve already passed the biggest test of my life, that you won’t be just as difficult to pass.”

“And I’m not in the habit of being unprepared for tests, no sir.”

“So, what I’m going to do is exactly what I’ve done before. I’m going to revise. I’m going to read everything I can about the Mountain. I’m going to know you inside and out. I’m gonna blaze some Van Halen and focus on the incredible mountain before me.”

“Then, with all the knowledge I need in hand – knowing that you’re a demigod, knowing that you’re full of wisdom, knowing that those around you just so happen to suffer indiscriminately, I’m going to show up to Fuck the World and take the test.”

“I think you know what happens when The Generation Kid takes tests, right?”

“He aces them.”