Three Blind Mice

In Promo by Chip Montana

Three Blind Mice, Three Blind Mice.

See how they run, see how they run.

They all ran after the farmer’s wife.

She cut off their tail with a carving knife.

Have you ever seen such a sight in your life, as three blind mice.

That’s a nice little tune, ain’t it mate?

Well, I’m Chip Montana. And I’m grabbing nature…

By the BALLS!!!

But that tune, it makes me ponder more than just grabbing nature by its voluptuous balls. It makes me think of how blindness really works.

As far as ol’ Chip can tell, everyone blind has to, in some way, rely on faith.

Even a man who can’t see and negotiates with the world through a cane must trust, on some level, his analysis of what his cane comes in contact with, what his ears hear, his nose smells, so on and so forth.

But three blind mice? All they really have is each other.

Imagine them. Running around, acting retarded. “I’m a mouse and I can’t see shit.” “Me either. But guess what? I hear a big ass piece of cheese running around.” “That smells like a fat human cunt.” “Yes, a fat human cunt full of cheese.”

Then they get their fucking tails cut off.

It’s a tale as old as time.

Well mate, I see dumb, blind mice all the time, running around the absolute worst place in the world for three blind mice to run around — the fucking Slaughterhouse, and I ask myself in what world are these dead-eyed rodents really living? To enter a faithless place like this and try to spread their faith to the world?

No one ever said they weren’t brave.

And though its true there’s probably another SeeSaw out there, being a Farmer’s wife, probably got a dipshit name like SeeCunt or SeeFatBitch, that’s not the SeeSaw these three blind mice are encountering.

The SeeSaw they encounter will cut off far more than their tails. He’ll probably turn them into cat toys for SeePussy, the cat version of him.

…or is it me they think is a fat cunt full of cheese?

Well if that’s the case, I encourage them to come chattering up to ol’ Chip and fuck around, mate.

Because I’ll make sure they find out that all that faith won’t stop me from grabbing each of them by their little mouse balls and having my way with them.

Maybe SeeSaw will take their balls and turn it into a fucking table top footy game. Maybe I’ll just fucking stomp on them until their nasty ass rat guts are splattered all over the Slaughterhouse floor.

Because the only thing more annoying than three blind mice are three blind mice that won’t shut the fuck up about religion.

But its fine. Go ahead and talk about your faith. You blind pieces of shit won’t have much else to talk about once I let SeeFuck get his hands on you and fuck you in your little mouse buttholes.

Then we’ll see how you run.