Leading the Pack

In Mr. Kleen, Promo by Mr. Kleen

We appear before Kleen as he’s polishing his mahogany desk of any and all dust. He hums a jaunty tune as he does this, seemingly happy despite his actions and early elimination at Pandemonium. Suddenly, an intern enters the scene with coffee in their hand.

Coffee’s here, Mr. Kleen.

The former janitor doesn’t pay them any mind, motioning them to enter with the hand the rag is in. The intern, not wanting to piss off their boss, hurriedly places the coffee on a coaster before bolting out of view. This causes the former janitor to laugh before speaking.

“I remember when I had to take orders too. Back during my days in the Kingdom, I had to follow instructions given by the Zookeeper to the letter. If I didn’t, then I’d be scolded and punished like a darned dog.”

He pauses to take a sip of his coffee.

“I was berated constantly for not following orders to a T. As a result, I’d be forced to train in silence while the rest of the Kingdom got praise and rewarded for a job well done.”

He puts the coffee back on the coaster.

“It was while I was training that I realized that being a lap dog wasn’t for me. No, I wanted to be the alpha wolf. I wanted to be the one to boss people around and give them flak for a subpar job.”

Beat.

“So after… the incident, I abandoned my duties as the Yellow Python and formed the ACA. With this group, I’m able to live out my fantasy as a leader without needing to sacrifice my dream for a better, cleaner Arcadia.”

The leader of the ACA then picks up his nameplate and proceeds to polish that.

“Of course, there are people who would rather obey masters and perform tricks like a domestic dog. Take Drewitt as an example. A man I once thought was a lone wolf turned out to be a stray looking for someone to call their owner.”

Kleen shakes his head.

“All that got him was a dead companion and three other mangy mutts that he has to share John’s affection with. Tell me, Drew, was it worth going through oblivion and back just to be told to hunt for another member of the Revelator’s pack? I don’t think so.”

He chuckles.

“Now your master has sent you to fight me, the ACA’s pack alpha, and expects you to win like a good little lap dog. Little do you know that you’re entering my ring. Here, I can have my betas deal with you and your fellow mongrels before you even enter the ring.”

He places the nameplate down.

“When you go to war with the ACA, you’re going to war with a pack of ravenous wolves. When we had our fill of tearing you dogs apart, we’ll clean up the mess you made like you were never there. No matter what happens or who bleeds first, my hands will remain clean.”

We fade out as Kleen walks around his desk.