In Promo by Ether

“Highland Park was once a clean and beautiful place where the people were vibrant and the streets were full of color and soul.”

“One day, a Mexican kid arrived in our humble city and began looking for someone named Manny. One of the adults at the skatepark happened to know him, so he took the tot over to his hideout.”

“Except for that guy, nobody knew that the Chicano was a drug mule. Had someone, anyone else known at the time, we could’ve prevented a citywide crime ring from sprouting then and there.”

“Instead, the drugs were extracted from the little Latino. The cartel that sent him were soon able to start their empire by selling coke, good-fella, and crystal meth to the kids and former addicts in the skatepark.”

“Soon enough, Highland Park became a local hotspot for soul sucking drugs and dealers. People quickly became reclusive and miserable. The streets lost all of their color and soul within days.”

“All because one Pendejo was afraid to fight back against the cartel and not send drugs to my hometown.”

“I imagine you could relate to that mule quite well, don’t you think, Vigour? You were both sent to unknowingly destroy people and their lives while you get to explore a land unfamiliar and exciting to you all the same.”

“Your cartel, the Ashen, will soon arrive and control the planet because you and your people were too afraid and too stupid to fight back when you all had the chance.”

“Thanks to you, Earth is in danger of having its soul sucked out while all the life on it becoming reclusive, miserable wrecks. Worse yet, there’s hardly anything we can do about it.”

“I’d feel sorry for you if you didn’t cause this fucking mess to begin with. Now all I want to do is finish what Vayikra started and kill you before you can cause any further damage to humanity.”

“Earth, much like Highland Park, is my home. While I failed to protect Highland from turning into what it is today, I won’t allow your soul sucking miscreants from turning my planet into a destitute wasteland as well.”

“Had we known just what you were in advance, we could’ve warned Starboy and the fucking robot to kill you on sight. Unfortunately, we’re left to deal with the consequences of your arrival while you get to watch yet another planet turn into a dystopia before your very eyes.”

“Personally, I feel like you deserve more punishment than that. I feel like you need to have every last inch of your life beaten out of you before the Ashen can arrive.”

“And when we meet in that ring, that’s exactly what I plan on doing. You’ll be given absolutely no quarter while Tag, Pyre, and myself beat you to certain death in the middle of that squared circle.”

“We’ll deal with the Ashen when they come. Until then, be prepared to become the Hungry Girl’s latest snack. See you in the ring, mule.”