Water Cooler Talk

In Promo by Avalon

“Hey Ted, you see the new guy that got signed, that lucha-guy?”

“No Phillip, I didn’t notice the new signee, when it’s my job to film everyone with a camera. No shit I noticed him.”

“Ted, why are you always this aggressive? Chill the fuck out man, I’m just making conversation. Goddamn.”

“I’m sorry, look I’m sorry. I ju-…I don’t like being this guy, I’m trying not to be him. I’m sorry.”

“No, hey, no it’s ok man. It’s alright, it really wasn’t a big deal. But yeah that Lucha-guy he looks like he…”


“Are you…are you crying?

“No! Just, quit looking at me. What about this fucking Luchador, huh?”

“Well it’s just…he’s like something out of the fifties and sixties. He’s even working under the name ‘Avalon’. Total retro throwback act.”

“What’s so weird about that? Don’t those guys pass their masks and names down to their kids and grandkids all the time?”

“Yeah, but he isn’t ‘Avalon Junior’, or ‘Son of Avalon’. He full on is acting like the guy who used to star in all those movies. You know, those goofy ones where he’d end up fighting zombies or witches, or the ghost of Hitler or whoever.”

“Hey, good for him. That makes for good marketing, right?”

“I mean…I guess. He’s going up against Rasputin at InVasion.”

“Who, the homeless guy? I constantly thought that guy was gonna give someone Tetanus. Or bite someone and give them Hep C or something.”

“Ha ha ha, yeah, hope Revlon got all his shots.”

“Oh, I’m sure he’s fine. He’s been working out in the gym we always have in our arena, dude’s been crushing it on the deadlifts and the benchpresses.”

“How can you tell it’s him, doesn’t those guys wear a mask when they wrestle?”

“Yeah, but this guy has been wearing his all the time. In the gym when he’s on the treadmill or jumping rope, he’s wearing a tracksuit along with the mask.”

“That sounds exhausting, jesus.”

“Oh yeah, but y’know what with all the athletes we get through here, that shouldn’t be surprising. And I tell you what, we haven’t seen Rasputin for a while, but I don’t think he’s got this one. He’s never had the strength that others have, and he’s been too busy blowing that rat of his or whatever it is he does. I don’t like his chances.”

“Yeah, you’re probably right. But hey man, I gotta get back to work.”

“Yeah man, no sweat. Say hey to Linda for me.”

“I’ll try, she’s been so busy it’s like we barely talk these days.”

“Ain’t work-life balance a bitch sometimes?”

“The fuck do you mean, ‘sometimes’?”

“Yeah ha ha, good point! Alright, cheers man.”